new look

I don't have a huge aversion to change, as a person. If I am in a situation I don't like, I think about it until I have a clear path, and then I change that situation. If I am friends with someone who isn't good for me or someone I think doesn't really care about me, I let that relationship fade away. Sure, I don't dye my hair, or buy into new fashion, but that is more about the cost and effort rather than the change. I will try almost anything. New and change aren't negative words for me.
As a person.

As a creative agent however, change isn't really my friend. Whether I am writing, painting, drawing, photographing, doing yoga, even just practising one of my instruments I am strongly influenced by changes. Every change. Changes in company, changes in weather, changes in location, changes in time, my changes in mood (both long and short term), my changes in perspective, the list goes on and ever on. The cat shifting in position can completely interupt my thought process, and another poem will never see the light of day. All the changes in other peoples lives surrounding me (as well as my own) over the past few years have influenced my creative interludes extensively, and I anticipate more changes in the near future. Who knows where that will leave me.

Today, I took a deep breath and changed the look of my blog. As you may be able to see. I don't even know if it is possible to change it back. This means little to me as a person, but a lot to me as a writer (I don't really think of this as blogging). I really liked the old blog style. The colours combined in just the right way to make me want to write something when I visit the page (which is often because it is my home page). But as a person I like change, and I tell myself that it is a good thing for me as a writer. This layout may induce me to write even more than the old layout! It also may completely drain my desire to write here. The plan in that situation is to try another new layout till I find something that works for me. I am making this change in the hopes that it will induce me to make changes that will lead to me writing more in general without the usual depression driving it, and undertaking more creative things in general too... The more creativity in my life the better I think. I am aspiring to creativity as my main mode of transport, rather than the life-raft I only find when I am half drowning.